Hello folks, get it while it's hot.
Download it at @MediaFire or @Mega.nz. Alternatively, play it here @textadventures. (there is currently an error with textadventures. I'll put it up at a later date.)
Keep in mind, that this is an early test demo and is not polished at all. In fact, the Kelly-James scene is not yet integrated in. There is a female masturbation scene however and some different character customizations which is worth checking out. I'll release another version later that includes it.
I'm actually surprised how many bugs I was able to find while play testing, so I suspect you all will find a lot more. I am unhappy with the current stat tracking system because it's really complicated and confusing for me to program/set up the flags for. I may need to find a better solution for that later or just need to suck it up and do all the hard programming.
So, there's a certain structure I tried to follow when writing this. To create variations, it's basically 1 of 3 paragraphs randomly, followed by another random 1 of 3 then changing emotional states at the very bottom. Not all paragraphs are equal, not all of them are great and there may be some inconsistencies from one to another, I'll admit that. But I think it's varied enough that you won't be bored until the 5th, 6th time around.
Hmm, with this release I'm not really expecting any praises, I'd just like to know what you all think. There's a "game mechanics" button at the bottom of the front page that helps explain some of the systems that are going into the game. I welcome all discussion on what you hope will be in the game, what you think should be added, what's bad about it currently and all other comments, questions or concerns.
In order to keep things civilized, I'll be creating a new page for you all to post bugs, typo's, inconsistencies and whatever else on that page. Please don't post it here or it will be deleted and most likely ignored.
Edit: Haha, yeah, I found a lot more game breaking bugs, most of which I thought I took care of already. Instead of releasing yet another (probably still) broken version, I'm going to hold off until I have the Kelly-James scenes completed before pushing out the next demo version.
Edit 2: Keep in mind this is an early test version of the character creation, customization, masturbation scene and ONE (broken) sex scene between Kevin-Judy. There is LITERALLY nothing else.
It's great that you finally have something up. I've gotta say, the function of not being able to go "back" is kind of annoying, but I understand why it has to be that way. My suggestion here is to find a way to "save" your data. It's really tedious having to recreate your character over and over again. You could also have a "quick start" option which defaults your character to the original one from your previous game.
ReplyDeleteNoted, thanks for the suggestion.
DeleteThe sex scenes were considerably better in the last version. :(
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you feel that way. Can you elaborate to help me?
DeleteInstead of a cohesive well written scene with a natural progression it's 3 generic paragraphs being inserted in a random order. Even from a gameplay perspective it's not well done. I can't tell if there's any actual mechanical difference between the choices. With the exception of character creation, it seems like a downgrade compared to the CYOA version.
DeleteHi ID. Here are my comments/criticisms of the new version of the game (in no particular order):
ReplyDelete1. With respect to using Twine for this version, I notice that there seems to be a slight lag between the loading of each page. I'm guessing that this may be bug-related issues, but my worry is that once more content is added, whether this will increase the lag (possibly making it game-breaking).
2. With regards to the content, the opening sequence leaves me a bit confused. I understand that you are introducing stats into the game, so the nerd/average/jock, true love, and sexual curiosity options make sense. But having to input a name, surname, skin, hair and eye color doesn't quite gel for me. You're either playing as Kevin or Kelly. My suggestion would be to choose either character, followed by the death-bed descriptions of their physical appearance (without the options), then introduce the options of nerd/average/jock, true love and sexual curiosity.
3. In terms of content, I'm assuming that most the content of the previous version has been left out/yet to be encoded. So, I'll discuss what I've been able to play in this new version. I think introducing the penis/breast size and virgin choices is a good addition (no doubt that your choice here would affect your stats). The masturbation scenes (especially Kelly's) were also good, but it feels a bit tedious having to select options several times before the character gets off. But, the Kevin-Judy scene does not feel right to me (at least for this early part of the game). It's not that it is poorly written, it was a good sex scene (again having to pick options several times was annoying), but it seems out of character for Judy! In the previous version, when Kevin first brings up the subject of sex with Judy, her response is one of shock (with some anger and disappointment) towards her son (which makes sense), and the story progresses from there. In this version, he has breakfast, goes to his room, and Judy offers sex... it just doesn't flow story-wise. This would make more sense if Kevin and Judy have already had several sexual encounters prior to this scene (i.e. this scene is not a day 1 scenario).
I apologize for making this too long and if my comments seem pedantic. It's just that I love this game! The quality of your characters, story, scenarios, and sex scenes is so good, and so well written in the previous version. I just don't want to see it lost. Thank you!
I think there nothing about to worry. Icarus just skipped other parts before the sex scene. In the next versions he'll add skipped part of story
DeleteHmmm. I see. To explain about the lag, I don't think that there's any way around it. I don't necessarily think it has to do with content because the last story had more words and didn't lag as much so yes, it's probably slower due to programming. Besides some optimizations, which the game still needs, I don't think there's a way around it because of how Twine is.
DeleteAn example of how it works is that I set up a "Menu" page and then have it displayed on every other page with a simple recall function. But, the "Menu" page itself calls up functions from two/three different pages that are code heavy also, meaning that there's a considerable amount of coding that needs to be called up. The bad thing is that there is some noticeable lag. The good thing is, since those are likely the most heavily coded pages that will be all the lag there is. The sex scene pages are probably some of the slowest since they're heavily coded and requires java to hit the bottom of the page before anything is displayed.
I know what you must be thinking; that other much bigger programs run smoother, so why doesn't this? And I don't really have an answer for that because all my coding really does is display some vital information, check for specific flags and then display content accordingly.
To answer your other concerns, I don't think that having less options is ever going to be a better thing. I understand if you liked vanilla Kevin/Kelly because I've tried to make them very likable. Their design may be fitting for some but others do not identify as strongly with them and some would rather insert a version closer to themselves into the role, which I see the benefits to. I can see how it breaks immersion in this test demo but if you were going to play this and read hours of text, you'll soon forget about it after a little bit anyways so I don't really see it as a problem.
Lastly, yes, this is a test of sex scene functionality, (which apparently doesn't function as intended). I thought I made that clear enough in my posts leading to release but I guess not. There are another 8-9 scenes behind this that can branch out in a multitude of directions but they're mostly incomplete and odds are, you wouldn't get this page on your 30th try. I jumped to the scene for the demo because that's kind of the new system I was working on. It may seem limited, but what I was trying to convey is that every sex scene being something close to this in terms of variation. So instead of Ver002 where it would be:
1. Ask for cowgirl/doggy/missionary
2. Cum in various places.
It would give you all of those options to pick and choose with optional orgasms. So everything is still there, this is just that snippet of content. Plus, all good on long comments. Your enthusiasm keeps me enthused.
If possible, I would add a undo button in future test builds. I've had a bug multiple times where hitting "make her come" just leads to a blank screen, forcing me to restart the whole game. Pretty annoying.
ReplyDeleteI'll echo the sentiments with character appearance too. I don't necessarily like it, nor do I hate it. I just end up leaving the name inputs blank(default keven/kelly) and hitting whatever hair/eye/skin colors my mouse hits first.
As to KP's comment about the leading up to the Keven/Judy scene... It's implied that Keven/Judy had a conversation about sex prior to the scene, so I'm guessing the author just didn't have time or just chose not to code it into the demo. I don't think Judy just strolled past her son's room and offered up sex.
Yes, I found the bad coding and thought I fixed it but apparently didn't. I'll release a Ver002.2 with the Kelly-James scene in with several fixes at a later date. Sorry for the inconveniences.
DeleteTo answer your other concerns, please read my answer to KP's comment.
After extracting your game, I noticed that a lot of what you had in the early version of the story was still there, but that there were some key points missing. Are the events that happened in the previous games still canon or are you planning a full rewrite. I ask this because I still want to know what's going on with Abby in that one scene you get when you abruptly leave Judy's route.
ReplyDeleteI don't remember which one you're talking about exactly, but yes and no, the new story would have the older story's basic structure but have a lot more filler because of the 24 hour clock.
DeleteI really missed not having a back button in this version. The best part about reading branching storylines is being able to keep your thumb in the page, and go back to try a different path. I can also echo Pixelmancer's concerns about the lack of flow to the paragraphs now.
ReplyDeleteI understand that you're putting a lot of hard work into the programming of stats, but honestly? I think this would work a lot better without all the stats and character creation options - just focusing on the story instead. I guess I just prefer my smut stories as stories, not games. Personal preference.
Your writing is good, the plot is interesting and I can't wait for phase 2 where he realises he's in a time loop!
Exactly my thoughts. Games are necessarily really terrible at story, and at being porn. Porn without visuals needs to have a really strong story because it has to arouse me mentally instead of physically. Visual porn games need to leave me the fuck alone because I can't fap and play at the same time. So the only porn games I like are visual novels and choose your own adventure games.
DeleteHave to agree with Pixelmancer. I like the concept of adding stats but in practice, it ends up making the scenes itself more generic. Don't get me wrong, I'm against having shorter scenes and "going" three times or so in one scene is a much better solution than having these really short three timeslots, so that's not the issue.
ReplyDeleteWhat I miss is the quality and cohesion of your previous version. Getting three chances to go through all available positions, with random bits of text that may very well repeat just doesn't compare to having three individually written, long scenes (where you can just go back using the browser's undo-button - yes, I'm going to bring that one up again - enjoy all of it and then decide which path you want to pursue).
Personally, I don't give a damn about character customization either way but I will argue against them as vocally as I can when it is added to the detriment of the game's atmosphere and quality. So, with that in mind, I urge you to either rethink how you want to do sex scenes (to make them longer and much less generic) or to go back to how you were doing things before, with ONE character per sex that goes through a limited number of changes, just as you had originally planned.
Your last release had personality, each character was interesting and each variation of the sex scenes told you something about them and exposed a different shade of their relationship to the player. In this demo, a lot of that nuance is lost to the generic nature of the scenes and that destroys the vast majority of the promise your project held for me.
Reading over these comments it strikes me that there's more negative than positive comments, so I just wanted to say a couple of things that may not get taken for granted:
ReplyDelete1. People only criticize things they care about. The fact that multiple people are writing entire paragraphs in this comments section should be something to be proud of. Personally, this project has me hooked and I can't wait to see it developed further.
2. You clearly have your head screwed on right by releasing demos early, and changing things up as you find different ways to code stuff. 'Fail early, fail often' is a valuable mantra to success.
Have you considered releasing 'the story so far' on a site like chyoa.com? The site's just had a pretty comprehensive redesign and it could garner more interest for your project.